The Halloween costume

The Movati hot tubbers were chatting about a fellow member’s halloween party. We heard about witches-blood wine, devil’s-claw cookies and a death-by-poison casserole that is lined up for eats.  Our diverse gang all agreed we did not feel unequal or not included because we had not made the guest list!

One lady asked, ‘What is your costume?

The hostess replied, ‘I’m wearing a skeleton costume but doctors, funeral directors and those with anorexia might find me politically incorrect.’ The giggling started.

‘Yes’, said another. ‘I suppose if you went as a cowgirl you’d be thought unsympathetic to gun violence in our society’, commented a grey-haired woman. The chuckling continued.

I bet if you dressed up as a black cat someone might accuse you of racism or lacking in concern for dogs,‘ chimed in a brown skinned friend. We all tittered again.

Maybe you could dress as a politician’, I suggested.

Yes’, said a soaker. ‘If you want to be Justin Trudeau just don’t wear one of his blackface costumes or Indian costumes which cost taxpayers a couple hundred thousand dollars.’ The snickering became universal.

I threw out a little bait to get us another joke by saying, ‘I wonder what Justin and Sophie will dress up as this year?’

Not a Jane or Jody costume I am willing to bet,’ someone quipped and guffaws resounded.

A new member broke into our laugh fest and said, ‘If you want to be dressed up as a politician you will need a mask with two faces on it.’ Gales of laughter erupted from this quick witted interjection.

How about a mask split down the middle with a mouth on each side facilitating a change of narrative depending on who you were talking to?’ chortled yet another.

‘I have a great idea for all our newly elected representatives for Halloween’, I teased.

It is unique, probably never tried before and although might be a bit frightening to the electorate and the ‘Old Boy’s Clubs’, it could be quite amazing for Canadians to see.’ Smiles were everywhere as my friends anticipated a decent witticism.

What costume is that?’, my Muslim friend asked.

‘‘How about our politicians take off their political masks, strip off their red, blue, green, or orange suits and let us see them as they genuinely are? How about we scrub all the colours off them, put them into white suits with red maple leafs on them, and allow no masks at all? How about we request that each one be themselves, think for themselves, and speak only truth from the mouth in the middle of their flesh and blood countenances? We could have these suits made in Canada, by Canadians, for Canadians and call them ‘Team Canada’ costumes. I bet these suits would sell out in a day all over the country!" Hysterics followed and heads were nodding like bobblehead dolls, all around.

The hot tubbers enjoyed the repartee we were gifted with and ended the ‘laugh in’ traipsing into the noisy locker room smiling, giggling and bidding each other ‘adieu’, in several different languages. If only the country could be like Movati!

But ‘hey’, new government! While the Movati classic ladies enjoyed a few laughs at your expense this morning, be assured of our gratitude for your service in our democracy. You take a lot of heat as politicians and meeting the expectations of every interest group across the nation is a monumental challenge. We commend you for all you do.

However, there is always a bit of truth behind jokes that make us laugh the way the classic ladies did in the hot tub this day. We would be ever so happy if you took to heart the messages our jokes contain. If you work together, we know you can serve all Canadians well, without another costly election, for a long, long time.

Happy Halloween to you, our new government. We are all waiting to see your costumes and your masks. And would it not be something if those red and white ‘Team Canada’ suits, with no masks at all, appealed to each and every one of you?